A Sun Among Stars

 

Krystal Matheson is on the left in both of these photos.  In the first photo, her sister is to the right.  Let's keep her and her family in our thoughts and prayers.♥

           An amazing friend of mine, Krystal Matheson, died on July 12.  She was not just a friend to me; she was more like a sister.  Seeing her could make my day 30,000 times better.  She was always so happy and loving; she never let a single person feel uninvited.  And I'm sure that none of us would have ever guessed that behind all that happiness and joy, there was a girl struggling with depression.
              
        Due to a chemical imbalance in her brain, she suffered from severe depression.  It most often hit her when she was alone.  She loved to serve; she loved loving.  So when she was around her friends, her depression was not noticeable.  But, like mentioned before, when she was alone, her thoughts changed.
             
        I did not know about this issue until the morning she died.  My mom woke me up and sat me down on the couch.  I expected bad news, but not about sweet Krystal, and certainly not about her death.  Tearfully, my mom gently took my hands and said, "Krystal Matheson passed away this morning."  
             
        It took me a moment to understand.  For a moment, I thought I had misunderstood, because Krystal couldn't be gone, she just couldn't.  But deep down, I knew I had heard my mom correctly.
             
        I don't remember much after that, just lots of crying, so much that I couldn't move.  I was so hurt, I felt as though my heart was literally breaking.
            
        A few minutes later, my dad walked in.  He had been the first in our family to know about it so he knew the reason I was crying.  He sat down and holding me told me her story, of how she struggled with depression, and how that morning, some thought had completely overwhelmed her and she felt the need to take her own life.
            
        For the second time that day, I completely lost it.  I had never felt so hurt, so grievous.  Every time I pictured Krystal's smiling face in my mind, I couldn't believe that she had struggled to the point of suicide.
            
        I eventually stopped crying, and I tried to imagine what she was doing at the moment.  I pictured her walking beside Christ, happier then ever, sharing all those random facts she knew.  It was hard to have her gone, but it still made me feel some peace, knowing she was in a better place, free of the illness that caused her her life.
             
        Krystal had been in our ward, and so that evening, we all gathered at a previous leader's house to talk and do some service for the Matheson family.
             
        Many tears were shed that evening; much comfort given.  I'm sure the others felt the same way, but I kept expecting Krystal to walk through the door with a bright smile and open arms.
            
        Although this has been so difficult, that night brought all us as a young women's group closer together, and brought a certain, deeper than ever, love into our hearts.
             
        Today at church, most of us shared thoughts and feelings about Krystal Matheson.  I cried, and sometimes laughed, as cheerful memories were brought up.  Krystal and her corrections on our grammar, her random fact spouting, the way she made everyone she met feel loved.  She never turned away from anyone, instead she turned to them, with open arms, no matter what.  She said hello to strangers, and gave hugs to just about anyone and everyone.  She was, as I like to put it, a sun among stars.
            
        She was one of the brightest souls I've ever known, and everywhere she went, she shared that light.  She reminded me of the sun, always shining, always doing what's right.  The stars bring light to this world, but the sun brings more light than any of those stars.  I sincerely hope that someday, I will be able to be a sun, like Krystal, shining for everyone, whether they need it or not.  
           
        Krystal Matheson was an inspiration to me.  She led an amazing life, one full of righteous actions.  And although I miss her, I am so incredibly blessed to have had her in my life.  Although she is physically gone, her spirit is still here, comforting me, reminding me that she is happier now than ever before. 
            
        To the Matheson family:  thank you, for letting your sister/daughter be my friend.  My life has been changed for good because of the love she has given me.  I would not be the person I am today if it were not for her.  
            
        The world truly is a better place because of this one girl, Krystal Matheson, who loved to love.  I can feel the difference within me, radiating outward.  To Krystal:  God is with you 'till we meet again.  You have changed my life in ways you don't yet know.  I love you, and always will.♥

This photo was not taken by me, but you can see her shine and glow.